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5 Tips For Healthier Boundaries

by in Uncategorized July 7, 2022

5 Tips for Healthier Boundaries

Do you have any confusion about responsibility and ownership in your life?

If so, you may need to do some boundary work.

Boundaries: a line that marks the limits of an area; a dividing line.

Homeowners have physical lines around their property to determine what’s theirs and what’s their neighbors. 

In the same way, we need to set boundaries in our lives, mentally, physically, and spiritually to discern between what is and what isn’t our responsibility.

We all need boundaries. They help us know when to say yes and how to say no.

Maybe you feel like boundaries are elusive because other people have overrun you in times past. 

Somewhere around the umpteenth time of being taken advantage of, having your own needs ignored, and treated as though your time is not valuable, you start to believe that you’ve lost whatever boundaries you may have had.

The good news is that you can re-create your boundaries and make them stronger and healthier than ever. 

How? Read on for a quick list of five tips to jumpstart your life and put it on track for a happier you.

1. Permit yourself to start over. 

While this step seems obvious, don’t neglect its importance. Give yourself permission to set boundaries and declare you’re important enough to have them. Also, acknowledge it’s ok to start over so you’re not getting hung up on the past. That is you, moving forward.


God’s mercies are new every morning. 
Lamentations 3:22-23

2. Pay attention. 
Here’s where you start getting into the details of who you are and want to be. 

How have people taken advantage of you in the past? Where have you wished there were boundaries? What do you need to do to establish them now? 

Be mindful of your feelings. Look for the disappointment and anger. What has set those off? Chances are, those are places where the boundaries need the most work. 

You’ll find that self-awareness is key to success, so don’t be afraid to dig into your emotions.

Listen and hear my voice; pay attention and hear what I say. Isaiah 28:23

3. Where have you been? And where are you now? 

Chances are, much of what you feel about boundaries came from your wiring as a child. 

If no one taught you about having and respecting your space, it might be challenging to ask people to appreciate it now.

Examine the boundaries of your childhood and compare them to the limits of today. What’s lacking? What needs work?

Some of the things you find may make boundary setting more compelling. 

Ask for help from a coach or counselor to work through some of that weight.

I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14

4. Take care of yourself. 

When you’re not feeling well, being firm in your boundaries is nearly impossible. 

Being strong and healthy gives you the energy needed to put your foot down when needed. Taking care of yourself makes sense and is also necessary for future success. 

Remember the basics: Eat healthily, move, breathe, and get enough rest.
 

Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health as it goes well with your soul. 3 John 1:2

5. Speak up. 

There’s going to be pushback when you set boundaries. Having healthy boundaries means working on maintaining them, which means saying ‘no’ when needed. 


Being assertive protects those boundaries and tells the world you have something to say. 
 

Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person. Colossians 4:6 ESV
 

Need help? Enlist a support team who can cheer you on when you’re flagging – and who aren’t afraid to point out when you’re starting to slip. 

Sometimes we all need tough love, especially when pushing for better, healthier boundaries.

By following these steps, you’re not only drawing a line in the sand; you’re taking authority over your life. 

Healthy boundaries like fences keep the good in and the bad out. They protect you so that you have room to grow and become the person you always knew you could be. But first, you have to begin. 

So, why wait? Aren’t you ready for that new, improved you?

XODenise
denise@spaceforchange.com

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